All Hail Our Robot Bartenders

If you’ve ever seen the Terminator movies, then you know that SkyNet is coming and Judgement day along with it. If you’re a fan of the Matrix then you know we already lost to the machines and are in a comatose state being drained of our life energy as we speak. If you’ve ever seen anything Transformers related then you know Megatron is on his way and soon we’ll be saying “All Hail Megatron”. The point is that machines, while super useful and entertaining have the chance to go rogue and run amuck. Of course these examples are science fiction and fantasy, but as we reach new heights on what technology can be, does it really seem so far fetched anymore? I don’t know about you, but if the world is going to be taken over by robot overlords, I’m at least gonna’ get some drinks out of them while I can. Here are some of the coolest tech innovations in drinking. Check them out!


Have you ever thought to yourself, “Man, that walk to the kitchen sucks” or you just wish you could ask for a beer and one would “magically” appear? Well, you no longer have to worry about it because the Coosno has you covered. You can say the command and a hydraulic activated table top will rise, and inside is a refrigerator that can hold up to 68 beers. You can also sync up your tunes to it because it has a bluetooth speaker, and you can charge your phone on it as well. Want a trippy light show, it has that too. This is the ultimate party machine and it’s, like, a coffee table, so you can set stuff on it too! Amazing! This bad boy will set you back $499 bucks but man, is it cool.

  • A futuristic coffee table with tempered glass top
  • Perfect for living rooms, home theaters, man caves, or office lobby
  • A built-in fridge that holds up to 68 cans of beer
  • Voice control the fridge to pop up
  • LED tabletop and nightlight with 160,000 colors
  • Wireless charging spot for smartphone and charging outlets
  • Available in two sizes and two colors

Are you tired of having to drink your drink? I mean, it’s so much work. It seems like there could be a better way. Well, they found it. Vapshot! This is a machine that injects a special bottle with a mixture of air and alcohol. When you open the bottle it pops from the pressure release and you suck up the vapor that is infused with alcohol. It’s that simple.

The idea here is that drinking alcohol takes too long. In a normal process the drink must go through the stomach to the liver and then into the bloodstream. In the case of Vapshot, it bypasses those things because anything you inhale is injected directly into your bloodstream. Thus, you get drunk quicker AND on less alcohol.

These machines also come in CBD shots as well. You can find these machines in pubs and bars as well as standalone kiosks that you may see at the mall or an amusement park.

Frozen Jack & Coke

Ahhh…the slurpee. I’ve always loved them. They are the epitome of American excess. They’ve enjoyed their time in the spotlight as well, Pauly Shore made them famous back in the 90’s when he used to stick his head under them in movies and say one of his signature lines “wheezin’ the ju-uice”. Then of course the recent Stranger Things segment had the Russian character Alexei wanting a cherry slurpee in exchange for information. Hopper got him a strawberry slurpee instead and said it was the same thing. (It’s not by the way, cherry is far superior). It was a funny moment in an amazing show.

So now, the ultimate evolution of the slurpee. The Frozen Jack and Coke. That’s right! It’s a boozed up coke slurpee! You just click Regular, Vanilla, or Cherry coke and then you can choose from Jack Daniels whiskey or Bacardi Rum for all you rum and coke lovers. It automatically fills your cup for you and boom! I bet you’ve never seen so many people get “brainfreeze” so quickly. Hey, wait, maybe this is part of the Robot Overlords Plans. Oh well, they probably taste great!

MakrShakr System

This one is a little freaky guys. You can select on a tablet the drink you want to make. Click on a recipe or make your own, whatever. Then a robotic freakin’ arm grabs the liquor, ice, mixers, mixes it up and pours your drink. I’m not kidding you. Look it up!

This is a system that is obviously not ready for home use yet and is only in a few select locations. It’s cool, I can’t deny that. It’s like something out of the Jetson’s or Star Trek. Since these aren’t available to buy for the public I’m not sure how long it will be before they are available, but….I’m not sure if I want a couple of robotic arms living in my house. I have to remind you all of the Terminator. That robot arm and hand caused a lot of problems guys, a lot. Just sayin’.

Affordable Tech Available Now

64oz Stainless Steel Growler Tap

NutriChef makes a mini Home Brew Keg. It’s 64oz and it’s designed to give you that fresh tap taste that you get from the bar. Check it out here on Amazon.

64OZ VOLUME CAPACITY: Includes metal screw on lid for easy portable transportation and storage. Its 13.4” height fits in your home fridge.
KEEPS YOUR BEER FRESH: A traditional growler will let carbonated beer go flat after the first pour but not this mini growler, as it will keep beer vacuum pressured and fresh.
STAINLESS STEEL MATERIAL: Each of the accessories in the tap dispenser kit is constructed with S/S 304 stainless steel.
WORKS W/ DISPOSABLE CO2: Not included – Each cartridge will pump around 128oz of beer before depleting Co2 cartridge.
UPGRADED REGULATOR: Monitor the mini keg growler’s current PSI from the regulator gauge and fine tune pressure by rotating the adjustment knob to enjoy a perfect head on every beer.

Bartesian Premium Cocktail Machine with Push-Button Simplicity

If you’re looking to make a cocktail with the push of a button, look no further. This is your stop. Check it out here on Amazon.

INTELLIGENT COCKTAIL CREATION: Create endless craft cocktails in the comfort of home — no need to measure or pour. Just insert a cocktail capsule into your Bartesian drink mixer machine, select your preferred strength and press mix. The system draws the spirit from the appropriate reservoir and mixes your cocktail in seconds.
MIXOLOGIST-APPROVED DRINKS: Bartesian cocktail machine capsules were created by master mixologists and include the ingredients for favorites like margaritas, whiskey sours, old fashioneds and more.
VARIETY WITHOUT COMPLEXITY: Bartesian offers all the benefits of a fully-equipped bar, without the time and expense of stocking various juices, bitters, simple syrups and other ingredients. All you need to worry about is having your preferred whiskey, vodka, rum, gin or tequila on hand.
EASY-CLEAN DESIGN: An automatic cleaning cycle that runs after each cocktail is created, a manual cleaning cycle and dishwasher safe parts makes caring for the cocktail maker easy and ensures every drink tastes its best.
REAL, FRESH INGREDIENTS: Recyclable capsules contain all the ingredients you need to create a great tasting cocktail and are even dated for freshness. COCKTAIL CAPSULES AND ALCOHOL SOLD SEPARATELY.

So there you have it guys. Enjoy it while we still have our freedoms from the Robot oppressors. It’s not a question of “if” but “when”. Oh, and even though all this tech is cool, you still need a DD. Cheers!

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